the sun shines and leaves blow and my hope like autumn is turning brown. but i know it seems like i'm always falling down. but it does not matter to me, although it seems like it should. it's because i know i'm understood when i hear him say "rest in me little daivd and dry all your tears. you can lay down your armor and have no fear, cause i'm always here when you're tired of running. i'm all the strength that you'll need." it's up hill both ways, tomorrow i swear i won't act this way. but i know it seems like that is what i always say. but it does not matter to me, although it seems like it should. it's because i know i'm understood when i hear him say "rest in me little david and dry all your tears. you can lay down your armor and have no fear, cause i'm always here when you're tired of running. i'm all the strenght that you need." you know i want to be like jesus, but it seems so very far away when will i learn to obey, obey?
pedro the lion


last night i stayed up incredibly late and addressed letters to 23 complete strangers. also, i spoke to drew, who is the single most adorable thing that can happen to a girl when she's half asleep. i sent him a secret package, hope he likes it.
friday is cranium day in homegroup. i am so excited, and i can't figure out why. i only wish i were the proud owner of apples to apples. (dixie and norah and i should have a drunken go at it. wouldn't that be the most?) sigh. school dragged itself along today, work and tutoring followed suite. but now i'm home.
the bosses at work today promised to write me letters of defense against the admission nazis at marquette. i'm going to get into that school god damn it!
positive thought: alex sent me a copy of his first edition. it's lovely. i love zines. they get me right here (<3) yep. somebody else gets me right there too, but nobody knows but me. tee hee, crushes are so sweet, even though i know there is no way in hell that it would ever come to be. still, it's fun to imagine, right?
on another note, i have been having recurring sensations known as feelings. they are truly amazing. i feel like i don't have anyone to share them with though, and that's becoming a complication in and of itself. to let someone in on something like that, you have to trust them with all of your heart and soul.
is trust a feeling or a thought?
sigh. damn it. responsibility is killing me.
die responsibility, die.